I am fully aware that what I'm about to say will be
wildly unpopular. That's okay. I've come to terms with it, but I just
think it needs to be said! And it's far enough into the holidays and out
of fall that I feel the hype has died down enough to avoid getting
egged for the following words:
I. Hate. Like, seriously hate. Pumpkin spice lattes.
And
here's the biggest reason: I think it's inappropriately named. And I'm
serious. To me, the term "pumpkin spice" indicates the same thing that
the little jars of "pumpkin spice" in the spice section mean: cinnamon,
clove, allspice, etc. What Starbucks and the look-a-likes are actually
serving is Pumpkin Pie Lattes. Without the crust. Maybe Pumpkin Custard
Lattes? But pumpkin spice is literally (yes, literally) spices used to
spice your pumpkin pie. And if that's what the lattes were, then that
would be the tastiest thing this side of Nutella crepes. But it's not.
It's a mug of lies!! That said, I completely respect everyone is enjoys
their mug of lies. I don't have to like everything that Starbucks makes.
But the very least they could do is rename it, and stop filling me with
false hope at every turn.
Was
that a bit much? Are you still with me? Wow - congratulations.
Seriously - thank you for sitting with me through that rant, I think
we're all a little better for it. Go ahead and unfollow me, that's fine.
But my premise is valid.
Now, I'll tell what won't
fill you with sad and bitter remorse of wasted seasons sat in the
office: these pumpkin cinnamon rolls (not pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls -
they're appropriately named).
I
got the recipe from Smitten Kitchen and didn't change a thing. However,
I did have trouble with the rise. I'm not sure if it's the Pacific
North West working against me, or that the yeast wasn't fully awake (it
was within the expiration date on the label)... I've made them twice and
had trouble both times. On the second round, I was making them for
family after Thanksgiving and couldn't wait for a longer rise. I thinned
the dough with an extra egg, some oil, and some milk to make it into
waffle batter. It made fan-TAS-tic waffles. We topped them with the same
cinnamon roll icing. The batter made exactly 8 waffles for the group.
And exactly 8 cinnamon rolls on the first attempt.
Check out the link here
for the printable version of the recipe at Smitten Kitchen's website.
These rolls are fantastic. But I need to continue tweaking to get these
as fluffy as other rolls I've tried. The flavor is great, though. And
perfect for New Year's morning after a night of partying!
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Chocolate Coconut Icebox Cookies
It's holiday cookie time, y'all!
For The Great Food Blogger Cookies Swap, I decided to make a family favorite of mine: Icebox cookies! I have never made them before, but are one of the earliest cookies that I remember.
My mom never considered herself a baker, but she could (and still can) ROCK a cookie tray. At her legen-wait for it, because this next part is used to top your latkes-DARY! Legendary Hanukkah parties, latkes are brisket were always the star, but you have to have something sweet to finish the meal. She became a master of meringues (something I have failed at several times over) and spritz cookies (a favorite of my dad). But the cookie from her childhood, and the only cookie that I remember from my great grandmother, is the icebox cookie. I remember my mom making it a few times, but the meringues and spritz were her staples.
Icebox cookies are beautiful - spiraled and lightly flavored - and so easy to make in bulk. And, once rolled into its tube, it will stay in the fridge for days, or (if well-wrapped) in the freezer for a few months. They're like homemade slice and bake! The set up is easy: make a batch of plain dough. Divide into thirds. Add the flavor and food coloring to each of the small sets. I usually use vanilla and chocolate, then switch up the third. My mom would use green coloring and mint. I sent out blue coloring (teal?) and coconut. I experimented with chocolate, almond, and red raspberry. After you mix each third, you roll out each layer until its 1/4 - 1/2" thick and all about the same size (roughly 9x13) and stack. Roll into a log, refrigerate, roll in sugar, then slice and bake! Coconut flavor was a big hit! I used sanding sugar around the outside to add extra holiday pizazz (Holiday Jazz Hand Cookies!). And, here's the part to explain my lack of photos... They were so good and so plentiful that in addition to the dozen I had to send to each of my swappers, I had about 2 dozen left at home. I set aside about 5 for a photo shoot later (I get off work so late that I didn't have any daylight by which to photograph!), and gave my hubby permission to eat at will. He usually doesn't eat very many of my creations because they're all fancy. And he literally begs for sugar cookies. And apparently these were boring enough that in less than one week, he ate all of the extra cookies AND my secret stash. Leaving me without any photos for this. Now, I can't really stay mad at him because he is usually so good about leaving food that I need for blogs, and it does mean that he finally liked something enough to devour it.Recipe notes: This follows 3-2-1 proportions of the main ingredients of flour, sugar, and butter. Use 3 units of flour, 2 units of sugar, and 1 unit of butter. If you're using pounds, cups, or shoe horns - just keep these together. I found that 1 egg for the cups was *just* a little dry. I needed about 1 Tbs of milk to get the dough to a Play-doh consistency. Depending on your humidity or elevation, you may not need this. Decide after you add the flour. The proportions below, using cups, produce about 18 cookies. Soooo... here's the recipe! I hope you enjoy. And that yours come out mostly like spirals.Chocolate Coconut Icebox cookies:1 cup of butter at room temperature2 cups sugar1 egg3 cups all purpose flour 1 Tbs milk (optional)Flavors:1/4 extract of your choice (I used vanilla and coconut)~1 Tbs unsweetened cocoa (if using chocolate layer)Also:Food coloring Flour for rollingGranulated or crystal / sanding sugar for the outsideWax paper and saran for storing.(1) In the bowl of a mixer, cream together the butter and sugar until pale yellow and fluffy.(2) Add the egg and mix until smooth.(3) Add the flour, 1 cup at a time, and mix just until combined. If necessary, add milk (1/2 - 1 Tbs) until dough just holds together, like Play-doh.(4) Remove dough from bowl and divide into three individual bowls. In each bowl, add a separate flavor and food coloring (if using). For the best contrast, leave one without any dye. A chocolate layer also adds great contrast.(5) On a floured surface, roll out each batch into a rectangle about 1/4 - 1/2" thick, and about 9" x 13" in size. Stack the layers as you finish them.(6) Starting with the long size towards you, roll the dough along the short side so that it spirals on itself. Roll the entire log in saran wrap, and then in wax paper. Refrigerate for at least 1 hour, but up to 3 days.(7) When you remove the dough from the fridge, preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or silpat.(8) Put your sanding sugar in a shallow dish and roll the dough log to coat the outside in sparkly sweet goodness.(9) Slice your sparkly dough log into cookies about 1/2" thick and place on the cookie sheet. These will not spread much, but shouldn't touch on the pan. Bake for 10-15 minutes. Check after about 8 minutes, though - these will not brown much, but will start to look dry on top. My batches took 11 - 12 minutes. Let cool on a wire rack, then hide from your hungry husband so that maybe you can enjoy a few, too! Monday, December 3, 2012
Crab Scampi (And a rant typed from a claustophobic death tube)
Preface: The following was typed while flying at 31000 feet in a small, claustophobic plane from Dallas to Portland, on our approximately 5th rescheduled flight back from South America on a work trip.
If you follow me on Twitter (@kvetchnkitchen), you probably
noticed last week that I was traveling for work. The location where I was
working is quite difficult to get to – at least 3 flights. More flights come
with an increased chance of delays and hiccups. Let’s face it – it’s hard
enough with one flight. Though, to be honest I don’t remember the last time I
took a single flight to get anywhere. It’s been at least a year, I think.
Anywhere for work requires at least 2 (usually 3), and vacations are usually
cheaper with a connection (even SEA à
LAX, because who wouldn’t want to double trip time and fuel cost by laying over
in Salt Lake City but it’s okay because it’s cheaper).
Anyways, I don’t want to gripe too much because I really do
love my job, and I realize that I am very lucky to get these amazing travel
experiences, even if it is just to spend 11+ hours working most days. But the
trips to South America have been the most challenging. The country we visit has
a small airport (4 gates). It averages about 4 incoming and 4 outgoing flights
every day, and with the exception of Miami, it only services other South
American countries. As it is late Spring in the Southern Hemisphere,
thunderstorms are very frequent and prolonged. Basically, we were delayed several
times over and I am writing this on a cramped plane that is on it’s 3rd
of 4 hours but for such a long flight, there is no sight of television monitor,
in-arm entertainment, and I’ve drained the power reading on both my phone and
iPad. So as I sit, going on hour 24 of travel time, tummy rumbling, I tend to
fantasize about what I will make when I get home. Or what I can eat at the
airport. Or if that cough drop in my bag will stop the grumbling. And it’s a
bit much to spend $9 on a questionable Caprese salad. And I would just like to add that
trapping us on a flight with *zero* free entertainment options (not even a terrible, one-sided documentary?)
and then charging $6 per hour for Wi-Fi, but not make charging ports available,
is simple extortion. My butt hurts. My foot is asleep. And I want my two bites
of stale pretzels that I am entitled to!
And the previous rant has nothing to do with anything except
that I’m hungry on this plane and wrists are contorted into weird typing angles
as the man in front of my has his seat fully reclined into my personal bubble
and I have no idea what I’m actually typing. Anyway, onto to the recipe I made
before I left on my work trip. This recipe combines some of my most favoritest
things (in no particular order): butter, garlic, pasta, and crab. And because I
was feeling guilty, I added some zucchini into the final sauté. The recipe
itself has no special story except to say that one day I wanted shrimp scampi
because of my love for butter and garlic, but then the grocery store had a
special on crab, so I went for it.
Note – I was able to find quality, shelled crab at a decent
price. If you cannot, and want to splurge, find a nice whole crab and go
through the work of steaming and shelling (which I certainly would have done
because I am obsessed). If not, you can substitute shrimp, or even some nice
boned white flake fish (like cod… Cod scampi? This post is counterproductive
because now I’m hungrier than ever and we still have 45 minutes until our
descent). If you choose the fish, add it halfway through the zucchini sauté and
then add a lid to the pan to let it steam.
Ingredients:
1 stick of butter (stop with the judgey eyes – SURPRISE:
scampi is mostly butter. Let’s move on.)
1/2 head of garlic, peeled and minced [about ¼ cup] (use
fresh, please. I will admit to using jarred on many blasphemic occasions, but never in scampi)
1 large onion, diced (Yellow, brown, or sweet are all fine
here)
2 cups dry white wine, divided (one in a measuring cup, one
in a wine glass)
2 lemons, juiced
pinch of red pepper flakes (optional)
dash of Tapatío
dash of Worcestershire sauce
1 large zucchini, halved and thinly sliced
half box of angel hair pasta (you may use whole wheat if
that will make your conscience feel better, but to be honest it won’t do much
for that stick of butter you already put in your pan)
8 oz fresh crab meat, picked through for shells
1 Tbls packed fresh basil, thinly sliced
1.
Bring a large pot of salted water to boil.
2.
In a large pan, melt the butter over medium
heat.
3.
Once all melted and starting to foam, add the
diced onion. Salt, and cook, stirring occasionally, until they start to turn translucent,
but before the butter starts to burn. Reduce the heat, if necessary.
4.
Add the garlic, and cook a few minutes, until
fragrant.
5.
Add 1 cup of wine (have you been drinking the
other?), and cook just until the alcohol evaporates (usually about 2-3
minutes). Add the lemon juice, red pepper flakes, and dashes of Tapatío and Worcestershire
sauces, to taste.
6.
Add the angel hair to the boiling water and cook
per package directions (usually about 4 minutes).
7.
Add the zucchini to the scampi mixture. Toss to
combine, and cook until zucchini is tender (usually just about the same time as
the pasta takes to cook).
8.
Add the crab to scampi, and toss to combine.
Toss to combine, place a lid on the pan, and turn off the heat (but leave the
pan on the burner). Let the carry-over heat warm the crab while you drain the
pasta.
9.
Personal preference: I like to toss the pasta
and the whole scampi mixture together in the large pasta pot. Serve, finishing
with the basil.
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Cranberry Relish
Confession time: I never enjoyed cranberry sauce at Thanksgiving when I was growing up. I am all for sweet-and-salty, but it always seemed way too sweet, weird color, and basically with no business taking up precious gravy space (Truth: I love gravy almost as much as coffee). I never understood it, but everyone seems to be obsessed, and I'm left out in the cold on this seasonal conspiracy.
So the idea of being tasked to make it for the upcoming Thanksgiving dinner at my sister-in-law's home was not really settling. I couldn't see getting it from a jar or can, especially if it's time for me to grow up and actually enjoy it. Plus, Ihave a pathological need for approval need to impress my in-laws with my awesome cooking skills.
And then Megan sent me this. I laughed. I cried (from laughing too hard). It is rude, crude, and dead on. And it described a Bourbon Cranberry Relish that Williams & Sonoma will sell to you for $40. I'm not rich. But I could make that. In between my laughing tears, I actually stopped to ponder this dish. I like bourbon. So I could probably like anything made with bourbon. This highly scientific hypothesis has yet to be dis-proven (because, kids, you can never prove a hypothesis. You can only disprove it's opposite, and the closest yet has been a maple-bourbon martini but I haven't tried it).
Enter: Eat, Live, Run. She made a Bourbon Vanilla Cranberry Relish, and I adapted it based on my ingredients. I tried it this evening, and I was surprised by it! It's still a bit sweet for my taste - I'm still not sure if I will eat it with dinner on Thanksgiving. However, I am satisfied with this as an offering for my in-laws. I will consider adapting this as a dessert, too. Maybe I'm just not cut out for cranberry-lovin'. But I gave it a shot, and it's better with bourbon.
Ingredients:
14 oz. Cranberries
1 cup sugar
1 cup water
Zest and juice from 1/2 orange
1/4 cup whiskey (or bourbon)
1/2 vanilla bean seeds
So the idea of being tasked to make it for the upcoming Thanksgiving dinner at my sister-in-law's home was not really settling. I couldn't see getting it from a jar or can, especially if it's time for me to grow up and actually enjoy it. Plus, I
And then Megan sent me this. I laughed. I cried (from laughing too hard). It is rude, crude, and dead on. And it described a Bourbon Cranberry Relish that Williams & Sonoma will sell to you for $40. I'm not rich. But I could make that. In between my laughing tears, I actually stopped to ponder this dish. I like bourbon. So I could probably like anything made with bourbon. This highly scientific hypothesis has yet to be dis-proven (because, kids, you can never prove a hypothesis. You can only disprove it's opposite, and the closest yet has been a maple-bourbon martini but I haven't tried it).
Enter: Eat, Live, Run. She made a Bourbon Vanilla Cranberry Relish, and I adapted it based on my ingredients. I tried it this evening, and I was surprised by it! It's still a bit sweet for my taste - I'm still not sure if I will eat it with dinner on Thanksgiving. However, I am satisfied with this as an offering for my in-laws. I will consider adapting this as a dessert, too. Maybe I'm just not cut out for cranberry-lovin'. But I gave it a shot, and it's better with bourbon.
Ingredients:
14 oz. Cranberries
1 cup sugar
1 cup water
Zest and juice from 1/2 orange
1/4 cup whiskey (or bourbon)
1/2 vanilla bean seeds
- Weigh out the cranberries, picking over for duds. Afterwards, rinse the berries and let them airdry. Place them into a large pot.
- Halve an orange. Zest and juice directly into the cranberries.
- Halve a vanilla bean. Split one half and scrape out the seeds. Add the seeds to the cranberries.
- Add the measured whiskey, sugar, and water.
- Heat the pot over medium-high heat for 10-15 minutes, until all of the berries have burst.
- The sauce will thicken as it cools. If you prefer most of a sauce, hit it a few times with your immersion blender.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
C is for Cookie. And Crohn's
Crohn's can make things complicated. Like pooping exercising. Or work, or moving, or having energy to do anything. Basically Crohn's makes life complicated, and there is no cure, and I have it, and I'm running a really far, long time to help raise money towards research and a camp for kids that does not suck and is not complicated.
But do you know what's NOT complicated? Cookies. So turn right around, go back to Megan's site, and go bid on some cookies. The profits from these delicious baked goods (not just cookies, by the way) go directly to my fundraising towards my goal that will allow me to participate in a half-marathon with Team Challenge and CCFA. And you get cookies. That's a win-win if I have ever seen one.
Thank you for your support! And even if you lose some bidding, please consider donating even $5 (less than you were willing to pay for those cookies!) towards my goal. You can find my fundraising page, and more about my story here.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Crab Chowdah - CHOW-DAAAH
News Flash: I'm having trouble discovering what life outside of school should be like. Seriously - I have no idea. For the past 2 years... I've worked, gone to school, and then squeezed in some cooking in between study breaks.
And now... I work. Hang with my husband (which is addicting). I cook. A lot. I've helped Megan maintain sanity during the final stages of wedding planning. And I started training for this. And I haven't been writing. As I struggle with my "blogging identity", I am constantly amazed at the bloggers who can post witty and insightful things day after day - sometimes daily. I am still trying to learn, and I appreciate your patience as I continue to try. Because my cooking jazz hands are too jazzy to quit this. *jazz hands*
In the mean time, let me introduce you to my new favorite soup. Manhattan-style crab chowder. Pronounced "Chow-DAH". Say it: CHOW-DAAAH! It has enough substance with the potatoes and carrots to stick to your bones as winter noms. It has enough fresh seafood and light flavor to be satisfying even in the summer. And it is, while a little indulgent, insanely tasty.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Outlander Brewery (or: How I Learned To Like Beer)
Welcome to Beer Week. I went and tasted beer. And with the help of some friends, I was converted to enjoy some beer. Here's the tale of Outlander Brewery and Pub. Also it's long.
Confession time: I don't didn't like beer. I was the girl in college who, when playing beer pong barbequing having a quiet night at home studying with some pals, would do so with the malted fruit drinks (also known as: B***h Brew). It didn't help that the college beer of choice was Keystone Light. I grew up with Coor's or Bud in the house, and was taught the fine art of wine, not beer.
But over the years, my friends didn't give up on me. They helped me find (and like) Blue Moon (before my mom found it!) and other local Hefeweizens. They learned that I made the best ugly faces when I tasted IPAs (and yet I continue to try them. WHY?!?). And they learned that given the choice, I will still (almost always) pick cider or wine over beer.
Enter Jackie.
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| Hi, Jackie! |
Jackie has a friend, and his brother is Nigel.
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| Nigel, owner and awesome dude of Outlander. |
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